The Cafe du Monde in SL: Opening Soon...

The Cafe du Monde in Real Life in the New Orleans French Quarter

Opened in 1862, the historic Cafe Du Monde Coffee Stand in the New Orleans French Market is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week.  The staff goes home and locks the doors only on Christmas day (and occasionally when a hurricane blows in to New Orleans).

The cafe is famous for its dark roasted coffee and chicory, home-made beignets (you can even buy their famous beignet mix in boxes online), milk, and fresh orange juice.  Things are kept pretty traditional at the Cafe Du Monde.  The coffee and chicory are generally served Au Lait (mixed half and half with hot milk) as is the New Orleans style, but customers are welcome to request theirs black.  Iced coffee was not served until 1988, the same year they served soft-drinks for the very first time.



The Cafe du Monde in Second Life in One Quarter French



Cafe du Monde is dedicated to its customers and is a popular chat spot in the French Quarter.  Visitors stop by even in late evenings, perhaps for a cup of their decaffeinated coffee and a trio of the square, fried fritters dusted with powered sugar, known as Beignets. 

Like the Real Life Cafe, the SL Cafe Du Monde will be open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We won't close for hurricanes, but perhaps for the occasional Second Life maintenance schedule, and if you have a question or an event idea, drop Jami Titanium a  note card.

See you there for coffee!

Cartoon Boy: A Memory and a Lesson

While drinking coffee in the Cafe du Monde... I reflect for a moment on the
importance of manners, kindness, and the power of the word "hello."

When I was in first grade, there was this boy.  His parents had named him after a popular cartoon character of the time, and in looking back, it seems a terribly cruel thing that they did so.  I remember him so clearly...

I do not remember him because he was my first crush, or because he was smart, or because he was cute or funny or sweet or rich or any of those things.  I remember him because every day, he sat alone at lunch.  Every day, he played alone at recess.  And almost every day we walked by his desk in the classroom without so much as a nod or glance.

None of us even said "Hello" to him.

He was like a cartoon to us.  Sometimes we watched him and laughed.  Sometimes we simply turned him off and walked away.  He was not important to us, or significant in any way, and we were cruel.

Recently I have been visiting a Sim in hopes of being part of things there.  It's a lovely place... a beautiful build.  They have a lovely culture and history there.  It's a make believe world, subtle and lovely... and prideful.  I do not know why I continue to return, as when I go there, no one says hello... not even if I say it first.  And I feel like the Cartoon Boy there, eating my lunch alone.

Samanda sent me a note card today asking me to fill it out.  One of the questions was about my hopes and dreams for One Quarter French.  And I thought, suddenly and strangely, of Cartoon Boy. 

I want One Quarter French to be a place where people are greeted and welcome.  I invite you, when we open our doors... to say hello to someone you don't know.  To come in and sit down next to them and become part of their world.  Don't be the kid in the cafeteria who walks past the Cartoon Boy without a nod or glance and sits with the same group each day.
 
Instead, stop.  Set your tray across from his.  Sit down.  Breathe.  Smile.  Say hello.

I look back now and wonder... who was Cartoon Boy really, except a reflection of the inadequacies of human courtesy and kindness?

How hard is it really to say... "Hello?"

Eh..what..Come again?

OK so my Internet has gone from bad to worse and you know me readers I see things in a positive light and try always to be dandy. However I can honestly say in true northern spirit its doing me nut in. We had a meeting to night regarding our sim and I was on and off so much I remembered what Becca said earlier. "You should sue them for whiplash"...telecoms that is.


I have to say a touch of the grumps overcame me as I got more frustrated with not being able to communicate. I have been reduced to a text viewer where I see nowt and hear nowt and then it hit me. Quit moaning Beanie, you ain't sensory impaired! However I felt it and I am not in real life so I felt selfish.


When our group talked about things that had sprung up in the sim, I couldn't relate to what they were talking about as I couldn't see. Each time my Internet powering oompa lumpa kicked me off the viewer I missed chunks of chat when I returned. Nothing had context. When I tried to type to contribute I couldn't as I was endlessly crashing. I had been rendered blind, mute and deaf.





It made me think though having my ability to communicate crushed , if I thought it was endless it would be truly upsetting. However when I switch off my PC I can see Columbo and hear Columbo and OK yes on occasion I talk to him...." You clever thing you..Columbo". So I have pinched myself hard and reminded myself for the precious thing I do have and that's all my senses and for that I am grateful.

I'm not a complete idiot... some parts are missing!

So in SL I am sat on a tyre in a very unladylike pose, watching Gypsy the Pitbull lick the extra large McDonalds milkshake from Baby Maise's face (we has class) and reading Beans earlier post. And that means in RL I am howling laughing and need a wee quite desperately.




And I started thinking to myself...dangerous I know so hold on to your heels and prepare for a bumpy ride.


I was thinking many things....like why does the word monosyllabic have 5 syllables? Why isn't phonetic spelt like it sounds? And if you tied a slice of buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from height what would happen?



But most of all I wondered...why do we spend so much time being so very modest...if not downright critical of ourselves? If you speak to the 6 of us Quarter Frenchies about how to 'make a sim' you would get much the same response. 'Oh I don't have much of a clue about that kind of stuff I am a bit rubbish at all that'



Yet....with much help from our amazingly patient builder chicklets.....its happening. And we all have much more clue than we ever thought possible. OK so some of the instuctions can be along the lines of 'Just shift that little deely round under the oojimaflip and squiggle it a bit' or 'I like that doodah you stuck in the wotsit' but with the help of a TechnoNumpty translator its happening!


We found we have vision for what we want...classy, sexy, cozy, welcoming and OURS! And along this exciting, occasionally frustrating and just once or twice flipping terrifying journey we have found all these things we actually can do...and we very much like doing.



And surely for the love of everything I hold dear if I just brainlessly poke this dooberry for long enough it might work?? And does anyone have a cat I can borrow.....

The Transition from "Apple Ass" to "Pancake Pants"

Recently, I was informed that I had a large... well... an ample... umm... a really big...

Granted, a big booty is fun... but this is ridiculous!

Yeah.

It was the system skirt I tell ya! 

And as I had made my own shape, having edited, manipulated, tweaked and perfected the contours of my pretty little avatar, I did not have a "skirt shape" to wear with the blasted system skirts that make you look like you've got two basketballs bouncing around on the high end behind you.

It proved to be an easy enough task to make one.  I was actually surprised at the result.  As long as your current shape is modifiable, you too can have a more "svelte" appearance in those blasted skirt shapes some SL designers still use.

1) Right click on your avatar and select "appearance" from the menu.
2) Go to your shape, move down to "legs" and set butt size to 0.
3) Lower your saddle bags a bit (about 5 should do... but it depends on how wide your hips are really).
4) Choose SAVE AS.  You do not want to just save.  Use save as and rename your shape "skirt shape" or some other fabulously intelligent description.

Remember to "save as" when editing your shape.

Voila!  You will now have a butt to be proud of.  Just make sure that if you are wearing prim skirts or jeans that you switch back to your original... or instead of apple ass... friends will be calling you pancake pants.

Cheers!

>> Jami T.

Barry Manilow, the plant and me.

I have discovered I enjoy writing. Yes I know its not academic writing but it definitely beats writing about the care of a paediatric tracheostomy tube, my next project. Don't worry readers you won't have to endure that little article.

The sim is coming on leaps and bounds and we seem to be on track for March. Buildings are going up so are trees its exciting stuff. Alexa and I made a trailer park gypsy camp for which we just childishly guffawed at, complete with pit bull. A gypsy camp I hear you say? Its not stopping but its that kind of nonsense that keeps me on Second Life. Things you just chuckle at for no reason.

Second life is about the chuckle for me. Then it happened my Internet started to crash as though the oompa lumpa that was powering it had decided sod this fag break! Day after day telecoms endlessly try to fix it but to no avail. Then the offending article appeared. The oompa lumpa must of decided to take up horticulture as a plant is growing through my outside cables.

OK, so its not as big as that but it might as well be as its stopping me going on Second life and ensuring it takes me an hour longer than what it should do to watch Glee and complete a blog article. I am loathing that plant as it has become public enemy number one. Each time I log I get more WB's that I am starting to feel I have joined a tourettes self help group; WB, WB, WB, WB!!

I can't stay on longer than a goldfish's memory. I believe something wonderful has been put up in our sim, I wouldn't know as I only see WB's!!!

The reason tonight that I am bugged is that its Barry Manilow night. Why is that important, well secretly I fancy myself as Lola the show girl. Yes its camp but god do I love camp. Our fabulous builder's are beavering away at our sim. I am a distraction as I pet the pit bull and sit on a burnt out tyre. When its finished I will be Lola cavorting in One Quarter French, till that time well I like the odd cavort in Madame Lala's, my friends Torric and Billy's club. Bette Midler was great but its Barry Manilow night tonight and I love a bit of Bazza.

I mean look at him? His tasteful crimson velour jacket, his cheesy smile and his trademark conk. For once that is not a Beanie typo but is Brit slang for NOSE. I knew I was having a night in and well Barry was going to be my dream date.
I like Madame Lala's because it is all about the chuckle. Its the epitome of fun.
Getting involved in and setting up a sim in a team can be a bit arduous, it can make your brain ache. Especially if you are a Sim virgin. However seeing it grow, knowing people will want to come and enjoy your vision well that's what makes it worthwhile. I can't wait for One Quarter French to be up and running so I can cavort on my own stage but until then I am having downtime and cavorting to Madame LaLa and enjoying every minute.
Right readers I am off to hacksaw a plant, Madame Lala awaits and if I get stuck in Barry's Bermuda triangle well I will have a sulk on.
Time taken to write article 1 hr 10 mins, I am going to throttle that green fingered oompa lumpa!

Wait Wait Wait!

Sooooo here I am again the blog twitterer. The obvious choice to twitter about was Evie; for those following the blog will know that we are co joined pixel mateys. This time I deviate from the expected and put Sam in the limelight.

When we embarked on this venture to do our own sim it was the result of walking away from somewhere not the other way round. Its funny how something can take up time on your SL that when you leave it you think what now? I know Sam, having been the longest on SL did wonder what next? As previously stated in my Stav twitter we are strong minded people that generally know what we want. Sam is no exception. Sometimes I think when we meet as a group we go off at tangents leaping from one idea to another without actually closing some points. Then it comes "Wait!", she types it and it grinds us to a stand still its the best way I have seen of halting people and making them take stock. I like Sam's "waits". Sam is the clarifyer in the group. She won't move on till something is clear. We all need a clarifyer. I love our group its very eclectic but share the common goal of fun. Sam is all about the fun. I know, she once sold me in an auction for an unmentionable sum of lindens. I imagined her eating grapes peeled by a boy virgin as she brought down the gavel and said sold for 30 minutes. I am not talking street hooker here by the way . She is more classy madame of fun than pimp mummy.
Sam I imagine as a giggler laughing at the ridiculous and being impish. Its not that image that endears me to her though its a much more private thing. A thing I am going to share with you readers. Sometimes when you have had a crappy day and you just find yourself logging on Second life, you quickly work out whether you can be bothered being on SL. I know I do, I can only buy tat for so long. You end up in instant messages before you know it an hours gone. Generally my instant messages with Sam are about the sim pictures, buildings and me saying in the style of little Britain "I want that one". Then well, just in a sentence she calls me "sweets". I am not one for sentiment and you will never see me pixel hug or wear a titler of who I am betrothed too. I don't say I love yous or miss yous, its just not the beanie way. However when I read sweets well it makes me smile . It has this effect that gives me a warm feeling, not urinary incontinence but well a glow. Its genuine and heartfelt when she types it, because genuine is what she is. You don't get many genuines to the pound..northern saying.. its actually you don't get many of them to the pound referring to boobs but what of it. Everyone adores boobs and also Sam.

A man in a woman's world

So here we go a Beanie update. I am putting together information for my Beanie booth. I think the first topic will be lumps and bumps. So what better way to support this than with images of boobs and willies. So remember my article that I commit to my friends? Well I think they won't mind committing to me. Then I realise five girls one boy, not enough willies! Bear with me this story is going somewhere. The girls, Wendy, Sam, Evie, Jami and me well we are hardly wallflowers. When we meet regarding our sim we talk according to the agenda and explore lots of avenues, I swear Stav is raising his eyebrows on occasion. I know he struggles to get a word in edgewise at times. So here he is a man in a non wallflower woman's world.



I am conscious at times that we talk and talk and I swear when I look back at minutes, (yes we have minutes what do you expect from ex greeters and guides?) I see shoes at least mentioned once. Thing is he is patient, he has to be, it beats frustration!
I mean there are courses to facilitate men and women working together.

The ability of men and women to work together successfully is crucial in any workplace. This course examines how to develop the awareness and skills necessary to resolve conflicts and to meet other challenges that arise.

Learnkey 2011

Well he can't buy shoes for us to keep us quiet. Maybe he could get a conch like in William Golding's Lord of the Flies. Ralph ensured that any boy holding the conch had freedom to speak..ooh so a pixel conch.
Maybe not they did smash it with a rock then killed Piggy. Girls are prone to excitement too its a wonderful trait but I can see how sometimes you can't get in conversation with one sentence as a guy. We are all very different types of communicators and I love that. Each one of us has a quality that enhances each other. Me, I am the worse person in a meeting, they don't know if I have crashed or typing war and peace. Its not uncommon to hear Sam say type ENTER Beanie.



So I try to think what it would be like for me a girl with 5 males in a meeting, automatically I think I might have to fight my corner to be heard. It takes a certain bloke to embark on a sim adventure with 5 independent strong minded chickadees, so I take my hat off.
I am not sure if it is appropriate to say Stav can I take a picture of your willie? However I did because we are all friends and we seem to know no boundaries. I thought who on my contacts list can I ask that same question? I didn't know. So easy going, approachable and non wallflower enduring is our Stav.
Perhaps an expose on one of the others in our gang, perhaps I will do .......Ooohh you will have to wait!

Ooo La La!!! Who is this???

The centerpiece was moved in to take its spot in One Quarter French yesterday.  The Chip Butties aren't talking... but it's sure to be top rate!

In the meantime, things are going as planned -- faster in fact!

And the planning for the Grand Opening is in works...

Watch this spot! Oooo La La!!!

Ce qui est Ooh La La?

So Ce qui est Ooh La La? For us English speakers what is Ooh La la?

Well technically it should be oh la la, in essence meaning surprise.
Ooooh quelle surprise we have in store for you? As the crash test dummies ooh la la song starts "Her sugary lips" and there is nothing that tastes sweeter than seeing your vision grow.
I want to teleport you and show you, I want to shout out guess what we have but I won't because as the name suggests Ooh la la is going to be a surprise.
That feeling a boy gets when he has his first glimpse of a stocking top or when a girl gets her first kiss; I want you to feel that when you visit the One Quarter French sim.
So its progressing faster than a speeding light, who would of thought it!

I see you peeking at our blog but step into our world and sign up as a follower. As Goldfrapp said in their Ooh la la "Switch me on, turn me up". So come on and click!

Saving my Library: Support for Cancer Survivors in SL

So here in Second Life, I have begun this journey with friends, moving away from the old, and moving toward the new.  We are creating, building and moving forward.

I can't decide if Real Life reflects Second Life or the other way around but I'm walking a journey there as well.

I can't remember when it happened now, or even which funeral it was we had gone to (there were so many...) but I remember coming home and sitting together in the living room, and my mother told me: "Every time a person dies, it's like a library has burned down."

I know I will leave a legacy behind. 

Granted, I'm not a political advocate, or a movie star, or anyone famous for that matter.  The three children's books I wrote with a companion when I lived in my last home are still just files on my computer, and the novel I wrote last year sits, collecting dust, on my desk shelf, printed off but mute.  I've never even bought the stamps to send them out -- some inherent fear that they are not "good" enough I suppose.  So who will remember me?

I know I will leave a legacy behind.

In the last 11 years, I've been a teacher and a mother and a wife.  I know I have touched lives.  I've watched my students grow up, graduate, and have children of their own.  The greatest honor that could ever have been given me were the numerous invitations to weddings and baby showers I've gotten over the years from men and women who I knew as awkward high school teenagers, and who have now become successful adults... who remember me... and say I touched their lives.

I know I will leave a legacy behind.

But I can't bear the thought that my library will burn.  That with me, the memories and thoughts and dreams and hopes that I have nurtured in my heart since I could first form coherent thought, might die and never be a part of my children's lives.

I know they will remember me.  That's not the point.  But do they know me?  Will they be able to tell their own children a story or two and then say, "That was my mother."  When I die, will they see the woman in the coffin?  Or will their mind's eye take them back so that they can see the mother who gave them bad haircuts at home, couldn't play Wii to save her life, and burned the peanut butter cookies (every single time)?

I know I will leave a legacy behind.  And this is how I choose to do it.  My writing is and has always been my "voice."  These are the scrolls I've saved from death's fires.  And I leave them to you.


The American Cancer Society has created a support network for cancer survivors and their families in Second Life.  Visit the Sim for pro-active information, letters, and social events (including live support group meetings).

Click HERE to TP to the American Cancer Society in Second Life network.

Please follow the links below for breast cancer support and information:

Pink Ribbon International
Susan G. Komen for the Cure
Dr. Susan Love Research Foundation

For BRACA1 and BRACA2 information as well as prophylactic surgery links go to the following:

National Cancer Institute
Breast Cancer.org

Protect women.  Support legislation that prevents insurance carriers from denying women who test positive for the BRACA1 or BRACA2 gene mutation.  For information on GINA (Genetic Information Nondiscrimination Act) go to:

National Human Genome Research Institute 

Things I've learned

I've never really been a fan of change. Personally, I rather like the status quo and am a big fan of 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it'. So when it was time for me to make a few changes in my SL, I went into a bit of a panic. Yes, really silly, but I did. I was so used to doing things a certain way, at a certain schedule, that I knew I was going to be wondering around lost. But, to be fair, I realised I've been wondering around lost in SL for all the time I've been there. I've only had a few things to do to make me feel like I was actually doing something.

But, I'm now sitting back in amazement, watching as something, that was only just talk, begin to grow into something real. And I think perhaps I won't be wondering around lost for much longer, nor do I think that change is such a bad thing.

Of the 6 of us, I think I may be the eldest on SL. Feel free to prove me wrong, any of you, but i reckon I just may be. And in the 2+ years I have been inworld, I have learned that you can wonder around aimlessly or you can take the initiative and just find your own way.
I've learned that no matter how hard you try, you cannot always please everyone, nor, no matter how good a person you think you may be, there will still be people inworld that will dislike you.

I have learned that you make a lot of friends over time, but that there are very few that actually stay on your list for more than 6 months. Our likes and interests change all the time. What is important to me right now, might not be in 3 months from now, less likely in 6. And so we keep evolving. Some of your friends, evolve with you, some don't.

I've learned that anything is possible in SL. No matter how big you think your dream/s may be, if you have the will, and you have the right friends, it can become a reality.

I've learned not to trust just anyone. A mistake I have made over and over. The world is made up of all kinds of people, so is SL. But I've also learned to be proud in my accomplishments, and I don't think there have been that many in SL for me yet, but I reckon times are changing.
I've learned that sometimes change is necessary. It's sometimes scary and always uncertain, but if I'm going to make the most out of my 'Second Life', then I need to accept that change is inevitable.

And as I watch 'our' little heaven come to life, I have learned that change is good. I look forward to what is to come. I look forward to being a part of something really lovely and new. And I am so proud to be part of this amazing team.

Oooo La La!!! Building Has Begun!!!

AT 1 pm SLT when the Chip Butties met with Alexa Froobert and Becca Eyre, I hardly expected to wake up the next morning to a Burlesque Club.  But here I sit, less than 12 hours later, in a bit of silent awe in what will be the first One Quarter French build.

I've said good morning to the girls, but I think they are asleep at their keyboards.  I can tell that this will be their baby, and they have spent the night here, watching her sleep.

Becca Eyre drinks coffee in One Quarter French

Becca stands by the corner, a steaming cup of Java in one hand, and a smart little shoulder bag on the other.  Alexa is only a few feet away from her, pacing occasionally with her flirty animation override. 



Alexa Froobert paces inside the build at One Quarter French



I watched in amazement last night as the first build developed.  The walls flew up, the dome was created, a stage, a spiral staircase, and a wrought iron balcony.  There were no doors to enter the building last night when I sent a request to the girls that they take pictures of their progress and post it on Face Book so we could keep track.

The revolving doors to the new brurlesque club.

This morning, the curtain over the stage flutters gently, moving back and forth, and they have since put in a set of revolving doors that are somehow a tasty mix of sultry-sexy and upscale-classy.  Indeed, the club already exudes atmosphere, and the girls have impressed me with their efficiency and commitment.

 
The first set of photos of the new build can be seen on Face Book here: Face Book: Becca Riches

I imagine, as good as these girls are, there will be more progress photos to come in short order.

Its all a game....... isn't it?

I recently had a conversation with someone regarding real life versus Second Life. That being, real life is paramount above everything that is Second Life. To an extent I agree. I won't be missing exams, work, a meeting at the bank or that hot date with a possible Mr Right BUT and I say this vehemently Second Life isn't pixels to me its about commitment to those I friend and work with. When I discuss Second Life with a friend who thinks the name sounds like a cult religion or funeral home I start with the "well its a character that you move with keys and you dress up and ooohh you can do unmentionable things with". You mean "shagging" she says but no I was actually meaning ride on a bumble bee. Now I just sound weird. I then use that famous term "social networking" She raises an eyebrow; I can still see she thinks shagging.

My Second Life isn't about being second its called "Compliments Real Life" or CRL, (I just made that up, but it sounds good). However as tongue in cheek as it sounds it really does compliment my real life. I have friendships in SL that mirror my RL friendships. I exhibit the same personality in world as I do in my real world. O.K riding on a bumble bee is stretching it a bit but if I could find one big enough to harness in real life I would give it a go. It sounds fun! Animal welfare as paramount of course.

When I observe those new to Second Life rez and announce "what am I supposed to do in this game?" ; then watch as older residents take umbrage and state "Its not a game !" I would argue it is, as isn't life a game? You might meet the snake and fall and occasionally you see a ladder to climb to your goal. We compete for Park Lane and turn our nose up when we can just get a house on Old Kent Road. Then we caterwaul into Xbox 360 Karaoke wanting to be the new Christina or as I impressively attempted at Christmas Dr Dre.

Well in my real life I fall over and pick myself up again and jump on that merry go round hoping I will get somewhere. I think that SL can mirror RL its not a bad thing to think it of as a game with objectives set by us and possible goals.

Even games have serious rules. Have you ever seen a bunch of boys play Call of Duty? Pensive and testosterone spring to mind. For me its Operation, I sweat when attempting to retrieve the Charley Horse.

What I am attempting to say is once I make a promise whether its in Second Life or real life I commit to it. Yes real life at times is always an essential first however for those I friend and make promises to I commit. The key word for me is a promise, I don't do it lightly and I hope I have never broken one. If I never log on second life when I say I will its because probably I found that giant animal welfare approved giant bumble bee to harness and ride and got distracted.

Accessing the New 42 Group Limit in Second Life

Finally!  Linden Labs has realized that 25 groups just doesn't cut it.  I mean... between clubs, and SL work and SHOE STORES, I need way more groups!!!

You too can take advantage of the new 42 group limit (40 if you are in Phoenix) that is now available to users. 

If you are using the Phoenix viewer, make sure your advanced menu is visible (cntl + alt + D) and from the pull down menu select Debug Settings. 

A box will come up.  In the text bar type pheonix40GroupsSupport and select "TRUE" from the pull down.  Relog.

You're all set!  Be sure to save a few slots for your favorite and upcoming One Quarter French groups!

The Name Game: Reflections on Identity in Second Life

When I signed up for Second Life, I had no clue about the importance of choosing a creative Second Life persona, i.e. "name." As I signed up for my account for the first time, I plugged in a first name, looked through the list of last names, and didn't even realize I could refresh the list to find something more creative.  In the end, on the last page of choices, I saw "Titanium" and thought... that says "strong."  And so it stuck.

As "Jami T" I cannot see ever changing my SL identity.

I had no idea that in a way, "Jami T" would become a "brand."  And indeed that is the case for many of the "old timers" in SL that I know.  They make a place for themselves, create something and become part of it, and their name sort of becomes like a slogan that follows them around.  I know more than a few people like that.  And like them, it would be nearly impossible for me to ever change avatars.

I remember once asking a fella in London Hyde Park to go dancing.  And he said, "But whoa!  You're Hyde Park's "Jami T."  And I thought, "What the hell?"  He saw me as totally unreachable due to my SL persona and it was my first glimmer of just how important a name can be in SL.

Which is why, perhaps, those of us who have been in SL for any length of time prior to the move to display names and the "Resident" surname, find the shift in creating identity a disturbing one.

As MooCow Beeswing, pointed out, her SL name is a nickname that was given to her.  She chose it because it was an important part of her identity.  She remembers seeing all the names and thinking they didn't mean much to her, but then "Beeswing" stood out and she chose it thinking it was a cute match for "MooCow."  She added that the new user names with display names is "confusing and just very unoriginal."

Karola Silversmith: "If I could see one good thing in it, it's only
when someone named the avi with a typo."

One of the big issues with display names is that users can take advantage of this to create confusion, naming themselves after someone long established in SL who has a well-known identity.  As Karola Silversmith points out, display names are "really confusing for others and in work too.  Some names are really hard to read too, especially the "hand write" font.  If I could see one good thing in it, it's only when someone named the avi with a typo."

And older users seem attached to their names.  In looking around, the "older" avatars I see (those that have seen at least one rezz day or nearly so) aren't using the display names.  Or if they are, it is only to reassert the name they chose in the beginning.  Simon Sangria, who will celebrate his first rezz day in mid-May, remarked  that he would not change his name.  "I won't change it... It's been my name too long." 

Simon Sangria: "I won't change it... It's been my name too long."

After a friend of mine mentioned how difficult it was to "join" SL now due to the new naming policy, I went into the website to create a new account to see, and discovered that she was right.  It was difficult to find a unique "user" name without adding random numbers or silly combinations of letters.  With the loss of randomly generated surnames, a person has to come up with a user name that is unique from all other user names.  This seems to have generated a flurry of names appearing in-world with numbers or other random letters attached to them.
 
In real life, our name in inherently linked to our perception of ourselves.  It is no different in SL.  In a world where identity and "brand" means so much, it's sad that the new policy gives such a "prison number" feel to names, stealing away our identity in a subtle but powerful way.

   

Friends... an honest if surprisingly soppy story

"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." - Bernard Meltzer

I have spent the past week of my virtual life being constantly surprised by the friends that have proved to have shoulders truly worthy to lean on, and in some cases saddened by the ones who were only cling film friends... flimsy and liable to snap under the slightest pressure.





















So to me... what is a good friend? What makes a proper buddy?

I would say... it's the ability to be able to listen to your rants, tell you they are wrong... and then give you a hug at the end. It's about lending a shoulder even when they know you are being totally loony. Its about being willing to stand up and support you whatever the situation. Its being the carrot to my pea.




I am fortunate to have many such friends... more in fact than I knew.

Now I just have to figure out how to get a bus big enough to get them back to the safety of their cuddle coats.

At the Helm: Second Life and Celery




I was hoping to find celery to munch, but at least the garden tools were a distraction...

 
For no particularly good reason, I'm eating celery for breakfast this morning.  Except that perhaps some deep need in me was stirred last night and again this morning to take back control of my life -- to come back to the helm and steer myself away from oblivion and back into the center of the glimmering sea which once rose about me in undulating waves.

My daughter came to me last night, and pressed the pads of her small fingers against the underside of her arm and said, "I have grandma flaps." And she frowned.  

She's a twig really. But at the tender age of nine, she already knows the power of appearances in this world.

When I look in the mirror, I'm usually content, save for my c-ankles.  Yes, c-ankles.  You know... where your calves and ankles have no defining separation?  Oh, for the slender ankles of Victorian times, framed by the embroidered hem of an ivory petticoat above a small, buttoned boot.

Oh, I've tried it all -- soup only diets, running till my knees collapsed -- hell, I even own a set of electronic food scales that measures item weights down to the gram.  And I use it.  Every day. 

Control nut?  Perhaps.

I think that's why we like Second Life.  In Real Life, we often wait on the deck of the boat while others steer the ship.  They stand at the helm like immobile boulders, taking with them all our control... steering the journey as we wait for a turn at the wheel which may never come.   Here, within the pixel realm, we are captain of our ship.

Not only can I make my avatar look as I want (skinny, athletic, voluptuous, fairy, dragon, wolf, you name it...) but I can shape my world.  I can choose my family and my friends and my coworkers with a freedom that Real Life can never offer.  And I can mute the people who annoy me.  (Although, in looking at my mute list, I see that only two "names" are there -- two fountains on a Sim I frequent... listening to them disturbs my bladder.)

Move furniture?  Yes! I can!  Change clothes in public without taking off the previous outfit? You bet!  Fly? Of course! 

Second Life is our turn to steer the ship.  Real Life doesn't always give you the helm.

Sure... my avatar explores Second Life as a reflection of me, but that is not the only appeal.  She is my ship, and my mind and heart are at the helm.  The real world is often governed by circumstance and fickle Fate, and Second Life offers the chance to practice control in a way that is safe.  And so perhaps the real appeal is just that.  Risk with safety.  In Second Life,  I can fall... and fail.  And in the end, these pixels are expendable.  They may feel, or rather I may feel them, but they do not breathe... and a rebirth is always a possibility. 

A Chance Encounter at Milk Wood... with Debbie Ohi





inkygirl.omizu (RL writer and illustrator Debbie Ohi) and I bump into each other in
Milk Wood.  A fabulous spot for writers in SL.  Debbie on the left, Jami T on right.

I've always believed in serendipity... and the goodness of the human heart. 

And this little spot in SL has just plain stolen my heart!  Yes... the props and the environment are great, but it's the fantastic people and the writers who support each other and who welcomed me (instantly!) into their community who made my day today at Milk Wood.

Thanks Debbie Ohi. Today I feel blessed...

http://debbieohi.com/secondlife/2011/2/4/jami-titanium.html

Do be sure to check out Debbie Ohi's works.  She works for writersmarket.com and is a freelance writer and illustrator.  Her blog is fabulous and Milk Wood is a great way for would-be writers to get going -- in any world. 

Hugs all!

The Word of the Day was "Cling"

So, the word of the day at Milk Wood was "cling."  And I thought... "How appropriate..."

Jami T. sits down with her muse at Milk Wood's "Writer's Dash."

You see Milk Wood does this lovely "Writer's Dash" each day.  They give us a word and ask us to write for fifteen minutes, brilliance not required of course but surely appreciated, and then we pass around our note cards (when SL is willing to let us save of course) and oooh and ahhhh over each other's fifteen minutes of inspirational genius.

But the word of the day at Milk Wood was "cling."

As a little girl, I once clung to a cat's ear.  Don't laugh... I'm serious.

My little gray cat Rusher, whom I adored, was let out by accident one day.  I was a touch over ten years old, and she came back the next day, battered and bruised and scratched.  There was a particularly nasty cut on her left ear.  My mother bandaged her up and put ointment on the wounds the best she could, as a visit to the veterinary during those days was not just a luxury, but an impossibility.

My cat slept with me at night, often under the covers, sidling up against the small of my back.  She thought she was a dog, perhaps, as she often curled up near my feet during meal times, though she never begged even for a scrap.  On my birthday she had kittens in my closet... in my toy box, and when I found her and the litter (there were only two, and both were female) she'd purred and squinted her eyes in pride.

So when her ear fell off, as a ten year old child who clung (perhaps desperately) to anything "good" in her life, I took it, wailing, to my mother.

"Throw that out." She said.  "It's nasty.  Rusher will live.  It's just her ear."

And I remember looking down at the withered gray flap in my hand thinking, "How can I throw away part of my friend?"  And so I wrapped the little bit of my cat in a Kleenex tissue and hid it in the bottom drawer of a small jewelry box on my dresser.  I told myself, "I can hold on to this part of her, so that when the day comes, she can be buried whole."  And, that was how it happened.  A year later, when my cat died, I brought out the ear and silently slipped it in the shoe-box with Rusher.  My mother  just shook her head and said nothing.

And so, I know that there is a part of my that clings to things, desperately.  Even, perhaps, to the point of despair.  But only because there is a part of me that is incredibly and indelibly loyal to anything that becomes part of my world. 

It is like that even now.  At present, I feel like there is an "ear" in my jewelry box.  And I hope that it stays there...  I have no desire to bring it out and put it in the shoe box.

Oooo La La!!! We Have Land!!!

I grew up on a farm, and I know the pull of land.  As an adult, living in town, I often long for the night-time country skies and ponds and fields.  There is something about a place that draws a piece of you in and lodges a piece of itself within your breast, creating that ever nagging ache that tells you when you are away that you're not "home."

I had wondered when our little group first set out on this adventure if there would be that same ache in my chest regarding SL land as there is in RL when I think of the farm where I grew up.  Today was the test of that, as we teleported in to what will become the New Orleans French Quarter.

There was no pull.  There was only a sudden drawn breath, a sense of relief, and a ridiculous grin on my RL face which no one else could see.  The tier was paid and "g'nights" passed round as the tired Chip Butties called it a night.




From left to right, the Chip Butties on what will soon be the New Orleans French Quarter:
HoneyRose, Bean Cisse, Stavros Jolbey, Jami Titanium, and Samanda Renfold
(Evie Falconer and Wendy Helstein with the group in spirit.)

 

Beanie's Booth of know how!

So here I am a blogging virgin about to make my big debut. Yes I have written articles but I twiddle my hair and get an expert to post. Well Gordon Bennet here I am the expert.

So an era ended and with time on our hands we thought what now? So as Jami more eloquently put it One Quarter French was born.

Writing skills, club skills, building skills, PR skills Beanie looking vacant skills! I loved the concept as I am a proper wiggle my botton burlesquey type girlie. However even I can't wiggle my bum forever.

Then it came to me the Beanie Booth!! I see the grey remember my profile? What else can I do well I am a firm advocate for feeling your bits not in an Ohh la la way (must get that TM ha).

Jami used Dickens, I use Robbie Coltrane " Spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch" It is the testicles I am interested in...no guffawing please! I am interested in boobs too and creating an awareness of basic life support. Providing links to those things we don't like to talk about lumps and bumps. informing people that there are life skills we could all use in that emergency we dread.

Its not a consultation its an empowerment of our beautiful human body. So get feeling busters !

The Two Most Powerful Words I Know

I have been an advocate in my lifetime.  I am a mother, a daughter, a teacher... and the reality is that in the core of these roles I am a lifestyle advocate. 

As a mother, I fight for my children, breathing them into my soul and pushing them out on their own two feet in such as way so as their stumbles will not mean falls, but instead the building of balance and muscle.  I have watched as they have grown from infants squalling in my arms (and oh God, did my daughter squall) to toddlers teetering on furniture and then to teens, kissing girls in the back bedroom with the light off when they thought I wasn't paying attention.  But when they came to me, I fought for them. 

As the daughter of a fragile woman, I am again an advocate.  I took my first beating for her when I was only four.  She'd fallen back, his fist in her face, and hit the table, unconscious.  I stood over her in my slender frame, a short, inadequate child, with my fists clenched at my sides, screaming soundlessly one word... "No!"

And, "No" has been my mantra for so many years now.  I rarely say it because it holds so much power.  But the word is branded on my heart; a searing wound that never heals. 

As a teacher.  I am an advocate.  When they come to me and say, "One more day..."  I lead them into that day with the same hands, now open, that once curled into fists to protect my mother.  When they come to me and say, "I can't do it..." I say, "Yes, you can."  And "yes" is the second most powerful word I know.

In the end, I am an advocate.  I am a fighter.  And though my arsenal consists of little more than two short words, the power of them has long held sway over any obstacle in my life.  I am not afraid to use either of them in defense of my own.  And know, that if I say "no" to you it is not because I hate you... and if I say "yes" it is not because I love you.  In the end, it is because I have the strength to be your advocate.

The Difference Between Construction and Creation



Bean, Wendy, Stav, Evie, Sam, and Jami
meet for the first official "Chip Butty" session

Even great things often have humble beginnings.  And so it was with the first official meeting of the Chip Butty Appreciation Society, consisting of bean Cisse, Evie Falconer, Jami Titanium, Samanda Renfold, Stavros Jolbey, and Wendy Helstein. 

The six friends met at the home of Samanda and Stavros and determined that their SL goals had changed, requiring a much needed move away from their current situation.

From left to right: Stavros, Jami, Wendy, Bean, Evie, and Samanda

Under the gentle prodding of bean, the group met again at Jami's skybox to discuss their common need for something that was "their own."  What followed was a dramatic chain of events that led to the formation of the "Chip Butties" and then the idea for "One Quarter French," a goal that the group hopes to make a reality in the weeks to come. 

Charles Dickens once said, "The whole difference between construction and creation is this; that a thing constructed can only be loved after it is constructed; but a thing created is loved before it exists."  The group realizes that in the end, SL is about people and relationships.  When the bottom line and Linden dollars begin clouding over the hearts and needs of the real life people behind the avatars, it is no longer worth it.

We are starting a journey.  Come with?